200 Year-Old Spoilers

Last week my sister and I went to see the new, live-action version of Cinderella. We enjoyed it, and also enjoyed some of the ads that came before it- for example, we hadn't heard they're doing a live-action of Peter Pan, and it looks really good.

Today I got to thinking about Disney movies and why they choose, change, and cut off the story lines of famous fairy tales the way they do. Well, sometimes it's obvious- quite a few of the real story lines are unnecessarily grim, violent, and graphic! For example, legions of small children didn't need to know Peter Pan killed his Lost Boys when they reached puberty, or that despite several forms of torture (her tongue was cut out and walking felt like stomping on shards of broken glass) the Little Mermaid doesn't get her prince, but instead, dissolves into sea foam. And it wasn't essential to the plot that in the original version, Cinderella's step-sisters mutilated their own feet to fit the glass slipper, or that in the very end of the real Snow White, the evil queen is forced (as punishment) to wear red-hot iron shoes and dance til her death.

Yes, some of the choices they made make a lot of sense! But today I was thinking about possible changes and additions to the stories that wouldn't necessarily make them any more pleasant or sinister, but instead, realistic and relatable. Mainly, life AFTER the "happily ever after." And I'm not talking about the Direct-to-Video sequels Disney put out!

Off the top of my head, I'm talking about things like Cinderella having a baby, and Prince Charming's father dying. They don't include that stuff because it involves sex and pain and possible risk of the mother and baby dying in childbirth. And why go through the trouble of grieving the loss of a character the story doesn't need or focus on? Well, in my experience, when it comes to joy and sadness, you can't really have one without the other. Each throws the other into sharp focus. With Cinderella having a child, she is given someone to care for and love and nurture, things she's been lacking a lot of throughout her abuse and enslavement. And you know what? Even if she died, or the baby, it would hurt like hell, but they would live on through each other. And with the King dying, yes, it would be so painful for his son and for the kingdom, but it would put the Prince into the position of deciding who he is and who he wants to be. What kind of ruler he is, versus the ruler his father was. What things are truly important. The loss of his father could be a defining moment in his life. And it would celebrate the life of his father! It's always seemed sad to me that our funerals happen after we die- because funerals allow us to focus on the life of a person, the joys and triumphs brought together for everyone to appreciate. It would be kind of nice to be there in person and realize how good your life has been. What other people are to you and what you are to other people.

I guess it's mostly the complexity of human life that I find lacking in Disney movies. In Disney, there's good guys and bad guys, heroes and villains, and hardly ever someone in between. I don't think I've ever met a person I thought was truly all good or bad. That's kind of what being a human is all about... not what happens to you, but how you react and grow.

I realize I got suuuuuuuuuuuper deep with all of this! Unnecessarily so! Haha it's easy to criticize and speculate about fictional beings :P

Anyway, on a different but related note, I love writing my blogs, but eventually as a writer I want to write fictitious novels, as opposed to my blog writing which is more of a journal. So at some point I may start a different blog that is purely fiction and may possibly include some Sarah-rized version of old fairy tales!

I hope you will support me with that too!

Sarah

Confessions of a Bench Warmer

Everyone has things that they are good at doing. Things they just naturally excel at. Well, I am no exception! I'm a good writer, a decent photographer, and I can make a mean bowl of ramen noodle soup. The thing about me, though, is absolutely NONE of my talents involve sports. Of any kind! I am about as un-athletic as they come.

Baseball- I will say this: if I had to watch a sport on TV (that was not the Olympics or something) I would probably choose baseball, because it reminds me of my dad. It's his favorite sport!  I grew up with it on TV and we've gone to quite a few games. At a very young age my parents taught me to scream out the words, "Hit me the damn ball!" much to the alarm and delight of people sitting around us. However, I have never played an actual official game of baseball! Years and years ago, when my family would gather at my grandparents' house on cool summer evenings, sometimes we would get out some plastic bats and balls and throw an impromptu game of something similar to baseball. Occasionally I would take a few swings, but mostly I enjoyed climbing to the top of the plastic play-house in the yard and being the announcer: "Aaaaaaaaand Marty Record steps up to the plate! He takes a few practice swings! Aw, steeeeeee-rike one! We wanna pitcher, not a belly-itcher! He swings! And it! Is! Out of heeeere!" I enjoyed being obnoxious.

Basketball- In my defense, I wanted so badly to be good at basketball, it just wasn't in the cards. For a long time my favorite movie was Space-Jam, featuring Michael Jordan, and I wanted to be just like Mike! It's sort of ironic because now I am Michael Jordan's complete physical opposite. Anyway, for a while there I spent some time everyday "shooting hoops" (or, more accurately, "missing the backboard entirely"), convinced that I was on my way to basketball super-stardom. Several years later I actually joined (entirely against my will) a basketball team! I was one of those kids that everyone feels they have to include, but is actually a liability. I was given one shot at the big time: once at the beginning of the second half, I was given the ball to start. It was nerve-wracking! I dribbled a few times, imagining what Michael would do. The kids on the other team started getting closer, so I backed up. Over the line. The whistle sounded. Out of bounds! And there ended my basketball career.

My teammates faces:

Dance- I like to dance if no one's around! I'm just not good at it. No coordination. Well, that's not entirely true. I can headbang extremely well and can do the Macarena, Chicken Dance, and Hand Jive with the best of them!

Football- I have never played football of any kind. It's just asking for trouble! Inviting disaster. Of all the sports they show on TV, football is one of the ones I understand least. It just makes no sense to me! When I went to high school football games to watch my sister and the dance team at half time, I would always take a book.

Gymnastics- I actually went to gymnastics for a year or so! My biggest accomplishment was a back bend. I did have one thing going for me- my body is naturally very flexible! I always have been. And not just my legs and back- my hands too! Please enjoy this camera-phone video taken in 2006:

Kickball- If you are familiar with playground sports, you will  know that kickball is basically baseball, just with feet. I hate it. So much. I have all these traumatic memories of being forced into playing kickball years and years ago. I always embarrassed myself! I would either take a big kick and miss the ball entirely, or end up kicking it in the wrong direction, and everyone would be mad at me. Ughh. IT'S JUST A PLAYGROUND GAME!! GAHHHHH

Snowball- This is basically a version of dodge-ball that we used to play in grade-school P.E. all the time. We were divided into two teams, each team on one side of the gym with the half-court line being the boundary. The teacher would line up about 8 soft balls on the half-court line, then blow the whistle and everything descended into chaos. My classmates would dash forward to get the balls and throw them as hard as they could, and I stuck to the wall. No one ever really thought of me as a contender, so I wasn't a target. So I would be the only one left on my team and have all the balls on my side of the gym and I wouldn't want to throw them because everyone was watching and I throw like a total wimp. Finally I'd end up kicking the balls across the line so the other team could throw until I was hit and the game ended because when it was just me the whole class was pissed off that they had to sit there.

Soccer- Ahhhhh soccer! I was on a soccer team for a very short amount of time, and my strategy was this:
1. Follow the herd of children chasing the ball
2. Avoid getting near the ball at all costs
3. If #2 is unavoidable, kick hard in whatever direction

It worked!

:)

Sarah

SPOILER ALERT

 As the title of this blog suggested, this blog contains serious spoilers! Reader discretion advised!

If you are my friend on Facebook, you are probably aware that I spent all of last night watching Season 4 of Game of Thrones. I FINALLY got it in the mail yesterday and since today was my day off, there was nothing stopping me from binge-watching! It took me right about 12 hours, including breaks. When I watch Game of Thrones by myself I tend to send my sister text after text, even if it's long after she's gone to bed. I just feel the need to document my shock! These are last night's "WTF" texts:

"Ahhh! It appears it was Margaery's grandma who poisoned Joffrey!"
1:30 am

"WHAT! Lord Petyr Baelish is responsible for the war! He made Lysa poison Jon Arryn!! This is nuts."
2:34 am

"Shae is testifying against Tyrion! She said he and Sansa are guilty of murdering Joffrey! Evil lady!!"
3:50 am

"TYRION JUST DEMANDED TRIAL BY COMBAT"
3:55 am

"WHAT is this madness????"
3:55 am

"Well maybe Petyr killed Joff too! So complicated!"
4:46 am

"Aaaaaaaaaaaand Petyr just kissed Sansa while Lysa, his new bride, watched!!!"
4:48 am

"...then pushed Lysa to her death"
4:52 am

"Daaaaaaaaang! All of a sudden Sansa has turned interesting"
5:18 am

"I just had to pause it and say "What what what what what what what what" as I stomped around my living room"
6:04 am

"Dang it they just killed off Jojen!!"
7:21 am

"EVERYBODY'S DYING!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!"
7:45 am

"I almost wish I had work today so I could talk serious GOT talk with the rest of the fan club at work!!!"
7:49 am

"Lol I'm besides myself with excitement but I'm like really tired at the same time... kinda loopy"
8:30 am
_______________________________________________________

I finally went to bed about 9:00 this morning. Staying up all night provided me with the opportunity of seeing the sun rise- something I don't see very often. There's something kind of cool about seeing the sun rise... and set! It's kind of marking the halfway point of the day.. a time in between. It doesn't last very long, and somehow each time is different.

I gave it a little thought and I think the last time I stayed up all night (without being sick!) was when I read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. It's actually a good time of day to get lost in a story... there isn't much as quiet and peaceful as the dead of night! The whole world asleep, the only noise is the quiet whisper of pages being turned. I remember sitting cross-legged on my bed, heavy book in my lap, neck aching from being curved over the book for hours and hours. Every so often I'd dry and switch positions- maybe lie on my stomach for a while, or prop my head on my hands. It was uncomfortable, but I had to finish! Like this morning, after finishing, I tried to relax and go to sleep but my mind was so focused on the story I had been living in for hours and hours that it was hard to drift off.

I've always been that way with books and movies that I love- I think a lot of people are that way. That's why these famous stories are so popular- the people who created them made it possible to slip into the pages or through the screen. They make the characters so real that you feel like you know them- and the characters' joys and sorrows become your own. When you finish the story, you miss them.

I also love how every author's writing voice is unique. The words they use and how they spin their tales give them their own flavor. Sometimes I crave a book's words like I do certain foods. I can think about a book for a few days, remembering some of the words and feelings, but there's nothing as satisfying as cracking the book open and tasting the words and emotions. Some books taste sad, some taste joyful. Sometimes the words leave me energized, and sometimes they make me tired. Good books leave you feeling satisfied, but the best books leave you hungry for more!

I hope I can write books like that someday.

VALAR MORGHULIS!!!

hahaa

Sarah

How to Speak Otis

I am going to make a prediction: if you do not know who Otis is or that I love her more than anything, you don't know me at all! And if that is the case, I will tell you- Otis is my dog. She saved my life! She is my best friend.

For your knowledge and entertainment, I have compiled a small list of things Otis and I say to each other constantly, so that you might get a glimpse into our amazing, one-of-a-kind relationship. I think some of these words and phrases are pretty well known and used in most, if not all, pet-owner relationships. Some of them, however, are unique to us.

Human to Dog Translations
(Words I say to her, and her interpretations)

"CHEESEBURGER"- A tantalizing piece of greasy beef hiding in a cocoon of silky, milky American cheese... and two stupid pieces of bread that she only eats because they still taste a little bit like the meat. Should be served with every meal (sans bread, if you please), but isn't because it's "unhealthy" and "will make her fat." Oh, puh-leeeeeeeease.

"CHEW STICK"- Little bones of rawhide goodness! She's only allowed two a day, sadly.

"HURRY UP!"- Sarah says this every time she lets Otis outside- a hint to go ahead and do her business. Also, less delicately: "Go pee pee!"

"HUSH"- Sarah's rude way of hinting it's not necessary to bark or growl at Nacho, the neighbor dog. Or when a doorbell rings on TV. Or when someone drives past the house. Or when the cats get too close to her chew stick.

"I LOVE YOU"- No translation necessary.

"LET'S GO FOR A RIDE!"- A seasoned car-rider, Otis loves going for a drive! She's old now, and can only get her front paws in the car. But Sarah helps her get in by lifting up her backside. Otis loves watching the town fly by and barking at dogs and cats and people, and she gets to ride a lot because Sarah doesn't like going anywhere without her.

"SCOOT SCOOT"- A not-so-subtle hint by Sarah that Otis is taking up wayyyyyyyy more than her fair share of the bed.

"SHOULD WE FEED THE DOG?" An annoying, rhetorical question.

"SQUEAKY!"- Oh, Otis loves her squeakies! When Sarah gets her a new squeaky toy, she cruelly taunts Otis by squeaking it and watching Otis react- Otis tenses up and every time she hears the squeak, she licks her chops. Finally, after seconds of agonizing torture, she finally gets her squeaky and she retreats to a corner of the room to chew on it until it is soggy and bleeding stuffing.

"TIME FOR BED"- Ahhhhhhh! The end of another chaotic, but fun-filled day! The only drama that happens at bed time is when Otis is lying on top of a mound of covers and Sarah tries to discreetly tug them out from under her and Otis gives a growl. But most of the time it's peaceful. Lying the dark, side by side, listening to each other breathing. Sarah likes to pet Otis' soft, silky ears until she falls alseep.

"WOOGIE WOOGIE!"- Woogie woogie is a fantastic, alarming word that tends to make dogs woof and howl! Otis is no exception. Perfect for scaring away deer and Jehovah's Witnesses. Originally penned by Maggie Linsky!

"YOU WANNA GO FOR A WALK?"- A journey into the urban jungle that is Raton! And evokes the emotions of: "Oh. My. Goooodddddddd! I thought we never would! Can we go now? Like, right now? I don't care if you need to put on shoes, LET'S GO, LET'S GO, LET'S GO! Ahhhh! Look! There's a perfectly good stick just sitting there in the driveway! I'll carry it! Wait, here's a better stick! I'll carry them both! AHH there was a cat! I know we have our own cats, but look! A cat! Ohh! Some people bicycling! I'd better woof at them and scare them! Woof! See that? How scared they were! Ha! Look at those dumb dogs in their fenced in yards! The lowly peons! Serfs! I laugh at them! AHHHH THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!"...
______________________________________________________________

Dog to Human Translations
(Things she tells me, put into words)

*DOG KISS*- "I love you too."

*EXHALING BRIEFLY BUT FIRMLY*- An indicator of great annoyance! It is designed to show she is on the edge! For instance, if you do not put down her food bowl AT ONCE, shit is gonna go down.

*NUDGE NUDGE WITH HER NOSE*- "Hi, friend."

*THE OAT-HAWK*- The Oat-Hawk is a naturally-occurring phenomenon in which the fur along Otis' spine spikes up, much like a Mow-Hawk, hence the name. I would say it is a great indicator of danger, but she's a little highly strung at times so the Oat Hawk could mean anything from a murderous intruder to Sheldon walking past her to the litter box.

*SIGHING SOFTLY*- "Poor me. I feel so neglected."

*SPINNING IN A CIRCLE EXCITEDLY*- "Oh man, oh man, oh MAN! Hurry UP, will you?? We got things to do and people to see!!"

*THUMPING HER TAIL*- The best indicator that she is in a good, playful mood. She has a big, fat tail so it's hard to miss! My Grandpa used to tease that she had a "beaver" tail. She and I both pretended to be offended.

*WHINING A LITTLE*- "I'm hungry. I need to pee. I want to go to bed. You're messing on the computer instead of taking me for a walk." OR, most likely: "My tennis ball is stuck under the chair."

Love and dog kisses,

Sarah and Otis

BONUS! BONUS! BONUS! 

She probably has more nicknames than everyone else I know put together! Off the top of my head...

Otis. Otis-Botus. Boat. Boat-er. Otie. Otie-Coyote. Tiss. Tissy. Miss Tiss. Tissy-wissy. Wiss.

Actually, We Sell Some Herbs at ACE

I have something I need to get off my chest. I am sure that anyone who knows me even remotely is already aware of the fact, but I feel the need to make it public.

I am a dork. Yes, a dork. A dweeb! A nerd! A geek. An uncool, goody-two shoes at times. It's quite pathetic.. and embarrassing. But here's the kicker: upon first glance, a lot of people seem to assume that this is not the case! They see my crazy hair and assume that I'm some sort of a rebel, or look at my tattoos and think I'm some sort of future-less punk or hardened criminal. WRONG! I dye my hair crazy colors because I think it's pretty, and to me tattoos are just a form of personal, permanent art.

The sad truth is, I'm no bad-ass... however much I might wish I was. Don't believe me? You make me giggle. Read on!

• Quite a while ago, I'd say at least 5 or 6 years, I was eating lunch at Arby's with my sister. We were sitting in one of the old, beat up booths with the peeling plastic lacquer, enjoying our roast beef sandwiches. The Raton Arby's is always busy around noon, packed with travelers who have pulled off I-25, ready for some food and a break from the tedium of cows and their yellow-grass pastures. I was munching on a curly-fry when a boy walked up to our table. He had on a new-looking sweatshirt, with the hood pulled up and his hands shoved deep in the pockets. He rocked back on his heels, looking uncomfortable. I was uncomfortable too- there were the two of us seated at the booth, but he was only looking at me.
  "Hey, sup?" he mumbled.
  "Um, hiiiii...?" I offered.
  "You from around here?" he asked, jerking his head towards the window.
  "Yep."
  His voice lowered. "You know where I could get some herb?" His eyes darted nervously around the restaurant, then back to me.
  "Pardon?" was all I could come up with. Herb? Herbs? What an odd request! What did I look like, some kind of gardener? Why look for herbs in Raton? What kind of herbs did he need? Basil? Mint? Catnip? I did a quick mental evaluation of all the establishments that might possibly sell herbs, and could only think of the grocery store. But it's Raton! We're a small town! Our selection would no doubt be rather limited.
  I was about to tell him so when my sister saved me from complete and utter humiliation.
  "No," she told the guy kindly, but firmly. "We don't know where you can get any."
  He gave a shrug of his shoulders and muttered, "thanks", and walked away.
  I looked at her, surprised and totally puzzled at what had just transpired. She rolled her eyes at me.
  "WEED, Sarah!" she hissed. "He wanted to buy some weed!" She collapsed into giggles. I think I turned roughly the shade of my curly fry, I was so embarrassed.
• The first time I got pulled over by the police, it was nighttime and I was driving a friend home. The lights went on and I about had a heart attack. I can't explain it, but I have always had this AWFUL, irrational fear of police. I seriously wonder if I was a criminal in another life.
  Anyway, the lights went on and I pulled into kind of an alley, to get out of the way of traffic. I pulled into the small street, paused, then drove a little further. The cop behind me almost had a conniption! I think he thought I was gonna make a run for it or something. Once I had parked, he rushed over to the driver's side window of my car and demanded angrily, "Why did you keep driving?"
  "Ohh, I'm so sorry, sir!" I blubbered hysterically. "I didn't know if you had enough room to pull in behind me!"
  Afterwards (I got a warning for having one of my licence plate lights out), I told my sister about it. "Oh my god," she laughed, "Sarah, most people would be pissed off and wouldn't care if the police had room!"
  What can I say? I am a kind and courteous driver.
• I pretty much hate the taste of beer. I might have anyway, but I think it might have had something to do with a traumatic moment from my past:
  A very, very long time ago, I was sitting on my Mom's lap at the kitchen table. I was drinking an ice-cold glass of milk, and my mom was drinking an ice-cold beer. You can probably see where this is going. Somehow, I took a humongous swig from the wrong one! I just remember being absolutely disgusted, and gagging and retching and shuddering uncontrollably as my body reacted to the repulsive liquid.
  All these years later, I do like drinking some alcohol... vodka is great and Red's Apple Ale is pretty awesome, but just plain beer? Nope! No, no, no.
• I have never been arrested. Okay, let's be honest. I have never even been close to being arrested! I am that law-abiding! I am that afraid of conflict! I am that afraid of police! I've ridden in a police car once in my life, and that was when I was admitted to the Parkview Child/Adolescent Mental Health Facility. For my safety and others, I guess. It was pretty weird.
• If you frequently read my blogs, you'll know that I recently admitted to being an atheist, but I will tell you that for about a year of my much earlier life, I was the Blasphemy Police! It was because my 3rd grade teacher was married to a pastor, and anytime one of her students used God's name in vain, she cracked down hard. I picked up the habit! It was strengthened when I fell in love with "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade" and Indiana Jones' father (Sean Connery) slaps him for blasphemy. Epic.

If you're my Facebook friend, you'll know that I've decided to do weekly blogs (Wordsday Thursday!) to get me in the habit of writing more. Please keep reading! 

Dorkily yours,

Sarah

Change!

At the rental counter at work, we have an appointment book that we keep all of the rental reservations in. We write down names, phone numbers, equipment, times, etc., and when someone picks up the equipment or calls to cancel, we highlight the reservation. It's also a handy place to write notes and doodles and it tends to get torn, dirty, and kind of greasy. Suffice it to say, it's pretty heavily used and by the end of every year it looks pretty rough.

As you've probably noticed, we're just about at the end of 2014! So close to the new year, in fact, that today we finally switched out our old appointment book for a new one. Business has been kind of slow lately and today as I was up at the front counter by myself, I looked down into our trash can and spied the old book. On an impulse, I leaned over and fished it out of the can. I used my hand to brush some dirt off the front cover and let it fall open to the middle of April. It was full! It felt funny to be in the dead of winter looking back at the busy spring. I flipped through the pages, meandering through the year. Even though we do hundreds and hundreds of rentals each year, I could still remember some of the specific rentals written down in the book! Looking more closely, I noticed that earlier in the year we had reservations for one or two people that aren't even alive anymore. It's kind of crazy how much can change in such a short amount of time.

Logically, there was absolutely no reason to keep the book. We no longer need the information it holds! But a nostalgic part of me objected- to see a whole year summarized in one simple log! Names and dates and memories. So when it was time to go home, I saved the book from the trash and tucked it away with my ACE apron, in the crook of my arm. And it got me thinking about change!

With every new year comes some change, but this year is especially full of transitions for me. I'd say the number one change is that my sister is moving to Albuquerque, to go to school. She has already begun packing and moving into her new apartment, and soon I will be leaving the house I have been living in to live in her old house. But the biggest change is yet to come- learning to live with her so far away! She is my best friend and I'm going to miss her terribly! But we can always text and email and visit each other often. I really am so proud of her for going after what she wants. It is a hard, brave thing to pick up and move and start something completely new! But she has always been brave and strong. She will do great!

Another change I've experienced lately is somewhat subtler, but still hard. About a week ago my Grandma had to put down her dog, Earl. He was old and sick and in pain, and it was time. But it was still so hard, on my Grandma especially, but on the rest of the family too. In our minds, Earl has always been strongly linked to my Grandpa, and to lose Earl was kind of like losing one last living part of him.

There's something I've been wanting to talk about in a blog for a while, but I tend to beat around the bush. It might bother or anger some people, but this is my blog, dammit! Haha! Here goes: I don't believe in God. I don't know exactly when I realized it... I used to go to church and Sunday School sometimes. And when I became so horribly depressed I remember hating the idea of God, because why on earth would he do something so awful to me, when I had done nothing wrong? I guess I realized I didn't believe in him when all that anger drained away and I realized it wasn't because I "forgave" him, but because I don't believe he is out there at all. Some people seem to find solace and comfort in the idea that "God" is out there, watching them, controlling every aspect of their lives. Personally, I find MUCH more comfort in the idea that it's up to me! I do what I do because I want to, I CHOOSE to, and when awful things out of my control happen to me, I control how to react. When I need help, I ask for it! Not from God, but from my family and medical professionals and my dog, people who really can help me.

That being said, I do feel like there is some sort of afterlife.... not a "heaven", obviously, where St. Peter bounces you out if you did something wrong, but something more complicated and intricate than that. It is basic science that nothing ever disappears, it just changes form, and I think that applies to life. I don't believe in the Halloween kind of "ghosts" that look like someone wearing a bed sheet, running around shouting "BOO", but I do think humans leave bits of themselves behind them when they die, in visible and invisible ways; some ways we can sense and some ways we will never fully understand. And I don't believe in "immortality" in the sense of the Fountain of Youth, where someone literally lives forever, but I do think people can achieve immortality through memories and words and actions.

So, when my Grandpa died, it was so hard to learn to live without him being physically here, but I don't think he ever completely left us. He lives on in his American flag, and in his wife and sons he loved so dearly, and in my thoughts when I play poker, and down at the ACE greenhouse on beautiful spring days.

And he lived on in Earl. So losing Earl was SO hard, but it comforts me to think that now my Grandpa and his dog are in the same place, the same state of existence, and I like to think that, though it's in a different way, they're still here with us.

I didn't intend to get quite that deep in this blog, sorry. Haha!

Anyway... change. I don't like it. I never have! I'm sort of a boring person... I like routine! It makes me feel comfortable. But the only predictable thing about life IS change, so I gotta deal with it.

And since New Years always sparks change, I've given thought to New Year's Resolutions, and, though nothing groundbreaking, I came up with one: I resolve that by the beginning of 2016 I will have AT LEAST a very rough draft of my first book. I resolve to write more! On my book ideas and blogs. I love writing and I think I'm decent at it, and I love the idea of being able to reach out and touch people with my words. I hope you'll all support me! :)

Another, less serious New Year's Resolution is to expand my Chinese vocabulary by studying fortune cookies! You know, how on the opposite side of your actual fortune they have words or phrases in Chinese? I've got a few down!
"Bah-shee"= Bus
"Bing"= Disease
"Dou-ya"= Bean sprout

Well, that's what I THINK those words mean anyway. It's a definite possibility some prankster with a wicked sense of humor makes the Chinese words up to confuse clueless people like myself. For all I know "bah-shee!" is an expletive and instead of calling for a bus I'm calling someone a terrible insult...


As for the rental reservation book, I'm sure I will eventually recognize its uselessness and throw it out, but you know what? I'm just not ready to let it go yet.

Have the happiest of new years!! And what are YOUR resolutions?

Sarah

I'd Like Some Reciprocity, Here!

I was super bored today and in the odd moments of the day, I compiled a list of very random anecdotes and thoughts that occurred to me.

• In 5th grade, the NDI (National Dance Institute) came to our school and did a week's worth of dancing lessons, culminating in a big grade-wide performance in the gym Friday night. Our instructors were a pair of lean, lithe 30-somethings with waaaaaaay too much energy and enthusiasm. I swear to you, their everyday faces seemed to be stuck like this:

Although, if I had to pick one, I'd say our female instructor was just a little bit more so. Just obscenely perky. She spun and twirled and sashayed and cha-cha-d all around our little gym, kicking and leaping and frolicking like some strange manic bat out of hell! As she careened from one corner of the gym to the other, she'd shout out instructions to the half-delighted, half-scared shitless bunch of 5th graders in her wake: "Okay now, jump, JUMP like a frog in the rain! Skip! Skip! Skip like little kangaroos in the zoo! Keep your fingers out and open like fresh cereal in the morning, before the milk gets it soggy! GO! GO!"

Anyway, if you don't know me, I will tell you I am many things, but "perky" is just not one of them. This, combined with the fact that I am a poor, poor dancer, left me kind of at odds with the instructors. I'm more of a thinker than a do-er. A good example of this would be on the very first day of classes: We students were taken to the gym and we sat on the floor while the instructors gave us a talk about what we were doing, how it would go, etc. etc. We then got to the topic of dance! 

"Sooooooooo!" screeched our deranged teacher. "NOW who can tell me!! WHAT is the most important thing about dancing??"

We all did our best to look around casually, hoping this mad-woman would not pick us... sort of an every-man-for-himself kind of attitude. BUT I gave it a little thought and figured my answer would be good enough. I raised my hand timidly.

"YES?" she hollered, her nod looking more like a convulsion.

"Well, I guess it would be that all of the dancers are in step... y'know, in sync with each other? If someone's not keeping count, they could mess up the whole dance."

There was a very brief silence.

"Good answer, but NO! You know the most IMPORTANT thing about DANCING? It's.... HAVING FUN!!!"

At the time, I just smiled and nodded, but inside I felt like:

"Fun?" I feel this way still... I mean, have you seen Black Swan?

• About once a month I go up to Pueblo to doctor's appointments and lately I've taken to hanging around Hobby Lobby! It is seriously the coolest store. Always cool decorations and tons and tons of arts and crafts stuff... I could spend hours in there! Anyway, last time I was up there, I took a look at the Color-by-Numbers section. Now, to be honest, I have not yet completed a whole Color-by-Numbers, EVER! About half-way through I always get bored, or spill the paint, or lose my brush. But, that day in Hobby Lobby, I found one that, I believe, will finally break the pattern! You see, amid the Color-by-Numbers of puppies and kittens and majestic looking horses, I found... THE LAST SUPPER! Yes! The infamous DaVinci work of art!
  Okay, so one thing about me you should probably understand is that I am not religious. At all. I wouldn't say I'm anti-religious exactly- I mean, I have absolutely no problems with other people being spiritual and having their faiths, as long as they don't try and shove it in my face. It's just not for me!
  So, you may be wondering why exactly I chose a painting of an iconic religious event to Color-by-Numbers. Well, I dunno... BECAUSE IT'S AWESOME! Haha! I love art in all shapes and forms and I love DaVinci in general. And as I stated above, it's gonna take something awesome to make me finally finish a Color-by-Numbers!
  And I gotta say, so far, so good! Over the past few evenings I have done about two-thirds of it and it's.... interesting. Haha! I'm not positive someone put all the right colors in the box because it's waaaaaaay to bright and cheerful. But.. I like it!
  
• On the subject of religion, I am a complete and utter slob! And every time someone reminds me that "Cleanliness is next to Godliness", I have to fight the urge to clutch my forehead dramatically and exclaim, "That explains so much!"
  
• Every year that I go with my dad and uncle to the ACE conventions, it's always kind of funny walking around the hosting cities because EVERYWHERE you go, (not just at the conventions!) there are middle aged, chubby-ish ACE guys and their families! It's kind of uncanny how you can pick them out of a crowd.
  This year was no different, and as we walked around Orlando at the convention and restaurants and theme parks, everywhere were middle aged, portly fellows wearing light colored polo shirts and khaki pants. I told my dad, "I wish ACE people had some sort of signal or sign, you know, so we could show solidarity!"
  He shook his head solemnly. "Don't wish that. They're all a bunch of nerds."
  
• So this year for my birthday, I'm really excited! The final Hobbit movie is coming out! It's kinda crazy because the same thing happened for the last Lord of the Rings movie, "Return of the King." Of all days, December 17! Yesssssssssssssss! Totally gonna geek out for my birthday. Well. You know. More than usual!
  
• I'm starting to fear I'm spending way too much time at work! Hahaha! I'm starting to pick up co-worker's lingo, some more understandable than others. For example, I'm starting to talk more and more like my dad, using his favorite words like, "Creeps!" and "Bunk!" But then, I'm also starting to do stuff like following a question with, "Or what..?"
  "Are you going home now, or what?"
  "Did you reserve the logsplitter for that guy, or what?"
  
  I don't mean to, I promise! :P

So, tell me some random thoughts you had today!

Sarah